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Old 27-07-2005, 01:49 AM   #5   [permalink]
sidewinder
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Join Date: 17 Jan 2002
Location: The magical land of unicorns and flying weasels.
Posts: 1,458
Well with over 700 views, I suppose I better update the story. Instead of just reposting it all over the place, you can read it here: http://www.deviantart.com/deviation/9172360/

As I stated in my Journal Entry, I'm not entirely happy with the material, but it does get the highlights and conveys the story well enough. I intend to actually have Jack start his story, but I just can't seem to get it right. I need the right sort of insane inspiration to write it the way I want it, but that just hasn't happened. My narration is lacking as well...I'm just not getting the story across the way I want it. That'll have to change for the next part because great narration is absolutely crucial if I want to pull it off right.

So instead of dwelling on all the little details and getting nothing done like I always do, I just posted what I have so I can move on. If I ever get far enough along, I intend to overhaul the story anyway.
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Read my Story and give me comments/critiques. I'll get around to writing more sooner or later...

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